Snake Tales
The woman asked if I could help her daughter back from Synanon. She said she found her 18-year-old smoking marijuana and took her to Synanon. But now they would not let her see her daughter or speak to her. I asked the dates she took her to Synanon
I then pointed out that was after the rattlesnake?
“They said they didn’t do it,” she explained.
I thought to myself, I will get her daughter out… I will offer them a trade.
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My new client explained that after finding her boyfriend in bed with another girl she sliced his tires. He responded by breaking a windshield. Back and forth they went on until she said he was going to burn. You can threaten a lot of things in Malibu, but fire is not one of them. She was arrested. Reading the arrest report I spotted one of the things she did was put a rat in his mailbox.
“Where did you get an idea like that?” I asked. After she answered I stated she apparently did not know who I was and then I told her. She responded,
“We’ll better your my lawyer than his.”
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Chevy Chase delivering the news on Saturday Night Live:
Today, Synanon announced its Christmas going out of business sale… so send him money early to get a rattlesnake for your mailbox
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“Mr. Morantz, have you taken any precautions to protect yourself?”
“If I answered that question I would have to change them, would’nt I?
“But I bought a pet mongoose.”
“Mr. Morantz, have you taken any precautions to protect yourself?”
“If I answered that question I would have to change them, would’nt I?
“But I bought a pet mongoose.”
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“Did you hear that 1000 Synanon members just committed suicide?
“Why?”
“They had to keep up with the Joneses.”
